so i get examined, which hurt like fuck, and am told that my 'cervix is soft but still long' which means that basically they dont want to induce me because it could cause complications in delivery as i am not quite ready yet they want to give my body a few more days to try and get there naturally.

when it comes down to it, the pain i am in only affects me, not the baby, but if i am induced it affects the baby and not me.

i do understand, and i do begrudgingly agree but fuck, another 5 days of this pain is kinda hard to bear. painkillers dont touch it, and thanks to having an internal exam this morning i am in more pain than usual because i had some random fellas hand up me ladybits, further separating the pelvis that is ALREADY FUCKING SEPARATED. yay.

plus, they want me back in hospital if nothing has happened naturally on wednesday, but on tuesday mia goes back to school so i also have to navigate around that too

so all in all, i am disappointed, fucking sore but i do know its for the best. doesnt mean i have to like it though.

i am TOTALLY not doing this again.

so i am setting off to the hospital in about half an hour. i dont know if they will induce me today or make me wait, but rest assured i will be kicking up a big fuss if they dont do something today

i think there is internet access by each bed, so will try and keep things updated, otherwise i'll be texting *Serenity-Falls and `pendlestock to let them know whats happening

wish me luck!

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